Romancing Yourself To Love
I was invited to a wedding in Mexico for two of my very close friends. (I actually introduced them.) It was a few months after I started my new hypnotherapy practice and I decided that I would “manifest” my boyfriend in time to bring him as my date for the wedding. After all, my mind creates my reality so I decided to make it happen.
A few single girls asked me to share a room, but I smugly denied, saying that I was going to meet my man before the wedding and will be bringing a date. When the travel agent called to reserve my tickets at the all-inclusive resort, I eagerly placed a deposit down for two people. Debi and her fictitious boyfriend, Robert Wright, all set for Mexico.
As the time neared for the balance to be paid, even with though no Mr. Wright appearing yet, I decided that I would give him more time. I gladly paid the balance for my future boyfriend, knowing he would soon show up and pay for our entire trip because he will be so successful. I was starting to secretly panic.
I was still single a month before the wedding, so now I was getting desperate. Any man would do at this point. I couldn’t get my deposit back so I started calling all my ex-flings to see if they wanted to come to Mexico for a vacation. They all were insulted and asked me, “Who was supposed to go with you? I don’t want to be the back-up or second choice!” I explained that I didn’t have anyone in particular and they didn’t believe me.
Two weeks before the wedding I was asking anyone (even my girlfriends) if they wanted to go on a free Mexican vacation. All they would have to do is pay for airfare. No one could make it. I had to suck it up and eat for two the entire week.
At first I was upset because of my lack of power in the boyfriend manifestation process. Then, my coach told me something really cool. She said why do you need a man to have a romantic time. Go and enjoy that room and romance yourself. It was a great lesson so I booked a few more days earlier just to be by myself before all the wedding hoopla began at another resort.
I had the most amazing romantic trip with myself. I played the music I wanted to listen to and took myself on long beach walks. I ate dinner by myself but received plenty of attention from the waiters. I sat across from the empty chair at dinner and pretended that I was with the love of my life. Instead of feeling sorry for myself, I was my own best friend, companion and true love.
The best thing about this trip is that I really got how I was so attached to finding someone on a time frame. I saw the tension it caused me to put so much pressure on attracting my true love. Trying to FORCE love to happen was not going to work. I allowed myself to surrender to the moment and let go of WHEN and kept believing that I knew it would happen.
When I got to the hotel where the wedding was scheduled, I started to feel a little nervous and uncomfortable being by myself. I walked up to the registration desk and gave the woman my name. She said, “Oh Debra Berndt, where is Mr. Right?” I laughed out loud and it released all the pressure. I answered, “Well, I really would like to know!”
When you stop taking the search for love so hard and serious, you can finally relax and enjoy the journey. Trust that he will come and you won’t see him coming around the mountain. I met Robert a few months later. At least I got the first name right!
Where would you take yourself on a romantic trip? Enter your comments below.