How to Change your Dating Karma
You often hear the word “karma” thrown around by different people telling you a variety of meanings and how it applies to your life. Some believe that karma is something you get from a past life and others think that it is something you absorb energetically from other people. The truth is that karma just means that every cause has an effect. What you put out you get back, whether consciously or unconsciously.
The cause is you (or your mind) and the effect is the results you see in your life. The problem that we all face is that the cause is unseen, driven by our subconscious mind. To find the answer to your dating woes, you simply have notice what you are creating and go back inside to change the cause to get a different result – new karma!
A simple way to work with this is to step back and witness your dating experience. How you see others is really how you see yourself. You cannot notice a defect in a person unless you also have a relationship with it yourself. If you are overly judging your matches online by their looks, you most likely are highly-sensitive to your own level of attractiveness. This is your own karma right back at you.
Do you feel terrible about hurting someone by telling them you aren’t interested so you just avoid their calls? This comes from your own hurt feelings when someone rejects you. If you don’t take dating personally, you can be free to openly express how you feel with those you date and be upfront and honest that you just aren’t interested instead of stringing them along. You will find you attract more people who give you the same level of respect and communication.
The most common dating karma I see is if you are attracting people who are unavailable (married, emotionally, way too young or long-distance). This is caused by you being emotionally unavailable. Many women and men are shocked when they discover this because they claim they are so open and ready for love. They forget to notice they are only open like that to the ones they cannot have.
There are so many ways to see what is stopping you from attracting the right person if you just pay attention to the karma that is active in your life. What are the results you are currently getting in dating? What is the pattern you see, the common thread in these experiences? Then, start to change the energy you are putting out by letting go of judgments of others, having more compassion toward yourself and being in the energy of love rather than fear and anxiety.
Once you start to become aware of how you are creating and accept full responsibility for your love life, you can dig deeper into the cause and change it. Sometimes you may need to go a little deeper and hiring a coach or working with a system that addresses the subconscious can get you what you want much faster than doing it on your own.
The tricky part of the word karma is to not get caught up in judgment of good or bad. Labeling something as good or bad karma isn’t accurate and actually contradictory to the truth. Sometimes the worst scenarios like break-ups or someone hurting you is the greatest gift that you could receive in life. Everything is neutral until your mind puts a label on it.
The act of seeking the cause of your single life is not to be used as a way to judge yourself harshly or feel like you are broken and need to be fixed. This should be an empowering way to retrain your mind to create what you want instead of the default karma that has been programmed from your early life experiences playing itself over and over again.
To think about karma as simply cause and effect gives you freedom from fear that some other force is controlling your life. You are the cause, you are the effect and you have the power to direct your life as you become more conscious of the power of your own mind.