5 Tips for a New Relationship
After a string of bad dates and unhealthy relationships, a good candidate can appear out of nowhere. He or she will knock you off your feet and you start to think, “Could this be the one?” The first few months of a new relationship are unpredictable and a plethora of emotions may surge inside of you from excitement to fear of doing the wrong thing.
This delicate stage will feel like catching eggs at an egg toss contest. If you grab the egg too tight, it will break or grasp too loose, it will slip through your fingers. To get just the right touch takes practice and you can think of your past dating mistakes as warm-ups for this new romance.
Here are five things to keep in mind when a promising relationship is beginning:
1. Relax. Don’t worry about doing the wrong thing. No one is perfect in a relationship even after years of marriage. You want someone who will love you unconditionally and not look for excuses to leave. If they do, they weren’t the one after all. You can make the worse mistakes and the right one will still love you.
2. Remember that you are the prize. Keep reminding yourself of all your wonderful qualities and why this new person should feel so lucky to have you. Of course, you want to believe they are the prize as well but never above you. This will keep the playing field even in the first critical months when your old habits are trying to creep back. When you feel worthy of good things, your new partner will subconsciously be more attracted if he or she is a healthy-minded person.
3. Take it slow. If you have been single for a long time you may be tempted to jump in to instant couple syndrome. Inviting your new love to meet your friends and family, planning vacations and taking about moving in together are actions that are probably best to hold off on until you are sure that your partner is going the same pace. There are no rules as to how long to wait to have sex or get into commitment-mode, but ask yourself if you are rushing the relationship out of fear trying to lock it in or if the relationship is progressing naturally. Keep open communication if you are not sure and don’t be afraid to express yourself when appropriate.
4. Expect confusion. You may be faced with plenty of confusion over your feelings, especially if you have never experienced a healthy relationship. You may question if your partner is the one and start to look at all his/her faults. This new relationship is going to be different and may even feel a little weird to you. This is just your old self who is afraid of true love trying to run away. Don’t ignore red flags, of course, but trust your intuition and don’t allow your fears to make your romantic decisions.
5. Be excited! Some people are afraid to be too happy because they might jinx the relationship. A reasonable amount of enthusiasm is okay because you will never have this time with your new partner ever again. Enjoy the newness, exploring each other and all the firsts that come your way.
Remember that your new love isn’t filling a void, just adding a little icing on your already sweet cake of life.